Thursday, May 7, 2009

Stubborn kanasai lady driver... Part 2

Remember my first entry with the stubborn siao Indian lady driver? Yesterday night, she nearly cause another incident with another driver. Sigh. Slow down lar, Indian lady driver. What do you get by being able to speed out of the condo like hells' not waiting for you??? Below is the next stubborn story.

After I alighted from Kancil, I heard one car came screeching down above one level from mine. There she comes, out from her cibai cave. She just swerved her car down from the slope and headed fast to the next slope down to next level. I shook my head. Wish I could just bang her cibai head against her steering wheel. She was in a hurry again to hell, i think. Speed! Speed! Speed!

Suddenly another car from one level below had also came up. That car was driven by one slim Ah Beng with his Ah Lian in it. Ah Beng wanted to go up the slope too. In fact he was nearly to the slope. Noticing the Indian retard lady was coming down fast thus he honked her a few times. Now the retard Indian lady is already bent at accelerating to go out of condo, as soon as possible, to see hell and seeing Ah Beng coming up she continued to speed up. Well, Ah Beng being Ah Beng right? He didn't stop but move up the slope. Seeing Ah Beng coming up so she screeched her car to a stop. Gosh. Another head lock between one Indian retard lady and one Ah Beng. Its gonna be a fight!

The retard Indian lady started to give handsigns to Ah Beng telling him to move one side. Swinging her palm left, right, up and down. Must be her ass is on fire or her toddy drinking husband demands her to buy roti canai in less 10 seconds. If I am Ah Beng I will show her the middle finger. Nah, he did no such thing. Guess what our Ah Beng did? He just move his car up with his fark-you-lar attitude. He did even not look at the retard. He just move up his car and it was so near to the retard. She just looked shock why this Ah Beng didn't reverse for her. Her look was so furious! Damn, you can't let other drivers to pass on while you enjoy your hellish drifing down the condo parking area, can you??? One inconsiderate retard Indian lady cibai driver... !

Sigh. What would you do if you have this kind of retard driving like a mad person at your place???

williamwilstroth... Move one side!!! Fark you!

Stubborn kanasai lady driver... Part 1

The condo where I am living now has a stubborn kanasai Indian lady driver. She is a very stubborn driver. She is one siao driver. The more I think of her sometimes make me feel like giving her a slap. Yes, one tight slap. Why would I want to slap an Indian lady for her driving attitude?

First of all, the parking space and lanes are small. Furthermore, the slope which cars are using it for going up or going down the levels are very narrow too. So it is obvious for drivers to slow down and drive carefully. I have seen too many incidents of near accidents involving both cars coming from the opposite way trying to speed up and down the slope. Luckily, there have been no mishap so far.

Second, because of my first point, the Indian lady driver speeds and drives up and down the slope so fast that all cars had to do 'The Fast & The Furious' ala brake and reverse for her to pass. I had a few encounter with her too. Being the gentleman, I always reverse my car immmediately for her to pass. As time pass on, her driving attitude is getting on my nerve. Its always an incident with her because she, being an idiot, will not slow down but just accelerate on, head to head, with my car while i reversing my car. Oh my god! What the hell this farking Indian lady trying to do?? Fark!! I just don't understand why she drives like that. For god sake, condo lanes are not F1 lanes.

Third, it is absolutely good to have good manners while driving in condo's parking area because of the limited space which made it necessary to drive with care and to respect other drivers to avoid accidents. Nowadays, people's attitude is unbecoming. Look at this Indian lady driver as an example. She doesn't say thanks to people who let her pass, speed up front at drivers who blocks her way, and pay no heed to safety of other drivers. What is wrong of being stopping to allow other drivers to go up the narrow lane before you? She knows the lane is narrow but she just refuse to stop for people.

Fourth, my condo's slope for each parking lane is small though it is painted with white dashed laines so both cars can either go up or down each lane together. However, I also need to blame the architects or developers for their judgement in designing the lanes. The lanes are so small and you think Malaysian only drive Kancils?? Come on, that Indian lady driver is driving a farking gold color Wira. Its bigger than that lane you gave us. Her car alone occupied exactly one lane more to the other. Fark, how on earth do you expect us to avoid every retard like her?

Gosh... I hate that farking retard Indian lady at my condo. Does she knows what is brake for?

williamwilstroth... kanasai driver...

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Life is like a stack up blocks game...

It is really mind boggling trying to get Photobucket's damn FLASH code to link into this entry. I'd gave up. Zooming on to next course of life. Recently, when I looked back at some of the photos from Photobucket I saw a photo of the wooden-stick-stack-up-game (forgive me, i forgotten what this game was called) which my wife and I played last Chinese New Year 2009. It's amazing isn't it to be able to stack up and finish to the last of the available wooden stick. I wish my life was like that. Just that. Stack to the top successfully. However, this is not true in our real life. To go up each steps or stack, its difficult and very high up.





Hence, I asked myself this very question: how do you really justify that you are at the top of the world? Does a rich man who had already attain his goal like getting a few big houses, a few luxury imported cars, a few wives, a few girlfriends and a few "rather born char siews" sons and daughters? Obviously, in our eyes he's a man who had achieved his level in our society. But deep inside, he might want more than that. He wants to rule the world. Isn't it all rich men want's to rule the world. Now, they can't do that, can they? What about poor people? They are those who don't even have the basic necessity like electricity to light up their houses. So their goals is to get electricity? Yes, that might be their goal. Out the poverty and in the filthy rich bastards to rule the world. As a result, we have the power house to provide us electricity and water so the poor can survive through summer, autum, winter and spring. Heck, I haven't even achieve my goals yet. Given that I am married (just), owns a small potato car except a blardy donkey house.

Owning a donkey house in some places is a bitch to brag about. Think of the hundreds of thousand of Ringgit Malaysia you need to waste to buy one donkey house. All for a semi detach? In your dreams! Where I am staying you need to sell ass to buy a unit that is neither even touching the damn earth nor touching the damn clouds. Hell, if the whole place fell down we will get another news hot on television. Despite my always grumbling of not going to buy an apartment unit yet my wife will go ahead because it is very near her workplace. At least I don't have to "Ahmad" her to work. Well, if I am a filthy rich Ah Beng then I would not think of buying a bunga-low at second thought. I will buy as many bungalows as buying condom packs every four or five days. Do you know condom is expensive? For a RM5 you only get 4 packs in it. So if you don't want babies you are spending around RM1.25 for each fucking session. A week you spend at least RM10 to get 2 packs. If at a month, you are spending RM40 altogether. Then in a year, it will total up to RM480. Well, I can ask the goverment for tax relief, can't I? Eh, we have our own rubber plantation right? Come on, its just RM5 per pack!!!!!! Fuck all you want, assholes!!!!!!!!!!!

As my good ol' friend always said, horizontal refreshment is always the best form of R and R. So what's there to grumble about if you really got a partner to relief off your load at RM5 per pack.

williamwilstroth... another one of my mixtures... condoms, houses, rubber plantations and so on


Thursday, April 16, 2009

My new define words while mandi-ing...

Alas... i finally figure out something that is out of this world! I've come to terms with what I am doing now.

Action Boleh Action Pandai

Now I figured out why I am so damn lan-9-si these few days. Because the work that I am doing got the two 'Action' elements in it. So i am now damn lan-9-si. Do you agree? No, you don't? Why do you read this damn blog. If you do then you must agree with me.

Oh you don't know what the fark I am talking about?! Then why on earth do you still keep on reading this entry. Fark! You must be moronic. Damn 9 moronic.

Ok.. Okay lar... this few days, my temper easily flair up lar. Not that I wanted it. My wife said I am going through a period of hormone changes. So what can I do? I can't do anything about it right? The body changes over the period of time when we grew older. Eh, I am serious. Boh joking, you know. Now, after my wife told me that I am changing so do I deserve a change in my attitude to further boost up my irregular temper of late? KNN... okay... okay... cool down... cool down...

Temperamental of late due to hormonal changes; adding to the fact, my waist area increase for the past one year since staying in evergreen Penang. I cannot say its bad because I'd got my wife to feed me. Plus Ah Bai condemning me F-A-T every day, I can't be skinny right? I am skinny... I am skinny... I am skinny... I am skinny... i am skinny... * poof! *

Ah Bai : Sei Fei Chai! Ooooi... Fei Chai! Fei Chai!
William : Oooi!... Hamik lan... Fi Toi! Fi Toi!

So again, those who work in Action Boleh Action Pandai... you got every right to be lan-9-si. Oh yeah... I love Action Boleh Action Pandai...

williamwilstroth... Action Boleh Action Pandai... YES!!!

Friday, April 3, 2009

Idiots are better left alone...

They are all over the world like us. The only thing that makes them different than us is that they got guts with a pea size brain. They talk and talk but it does not match their outcome. If these people sit next to you, you can go psycho. I got one at the moment.

Idiot : I am leaving end of next month, William.
Me : Good for you. I can't wait for you to leave. Why don't you leave now. There's the door. I feel more happy and can do my work with peace. With you around, you give me problems. You always have doubt with all your issues and always make me feel like I owe you solution. And everything you need me to teach you. Is there anything that you not need me to teach you? Honestly, I do not know what you are doing. You only know how to shake your head and give me a hook sign. That I even have doubt if you really understand your work. Plus, whenever I give you solutions or hints, you tend to look at me with full of your own doubts. Moreover, you talk a lot as though you know the whole universe but it does not equate your output. Therefore, its better you leave early.

Need me to say more of such idiots. Yes, there are lots of them out there and these people tend to screw up people's good day. These people only know how to shake their heads and talk a lot.

is sky the limit... idiots are everywhere...

Making my wife piss off is my passion!!

Do you want to disturb your wife? Ever thought of how she treated you and you do not know how to retaliate back? Look elsewhere no more, here is a list of them that you can apply. However, please apply them at your own risk. I will not be held responsible if you "died-ed" twice or you were force to sleep on concrete at night.

01. Repetitively ask questions when she's watching her favourite drama.
02. Repetitively feign forgetfulness when she's talking to you.
03. Repetitively answer her after she asked you the first question.
04. Repetitively ask if she wants extra during lunch, dinner or supper.
05. Repetitively scream for no reason when she's driving.
06. Repetitively ask her to slow down when she's driving.
07. Repetitively act stupid when she wants to talk to you.
08. Repetitively walk up and down behind her when she's using her/yours notebook.
09. Repetitively sigh and looked at your watch when she's doing her make up.
10. Repetitively imitate her whining.

Here's one last good one which I always do to make my wife piss off:

Mrs William : yak yak yak yak yak...
Mr William : yeah hehehe... yeah hehehe... yeah hehehehe.... oh yeah...

Mrs William : -__-"
Mr William : Making you piss off is my passion!

Mrs William : ** pinch ** pinch **...
Mr William : aduh... aduh...

is sky the limit... making my wife piss off is my passion!

Hello... you speak Cantonese ar?

Last week, I got a strange call from a Chinese lady, 60-301, who claimed to be doing a survey. I doubt its must be those conning people stuffs. So below is the incident:

60-301 : ** speaks unable to distinguish Mandarin ** ... survey...
Me : ** fark ** nie ke yi geng wor chiang Kong Tong hua mar?

60-301 : Nie de Hua Yi hen hou... lai wor men ee qi zhiang Hua Yi...
Me : Bu, ru kuo nie yau geng wo zhian hua... nie ee teng yau geng wor zhiang Kong Tung hua...

60-301 : Nie de Hua Yi hen hou... chip chop chip chop...
Me : ** fark **... clicks off my HTC... and silent it...

As a matter of fact, I don't speak Mandarin that very well. Furthermore, I don't even know why on earth that particular call I felt like speaking Cantonese. Anyhow, after that particular call I'd been scheming more devilish method to play-play with all these nonsense calls. I'll wait for more of this nonsense calls then I give my best prank to them. Hehehehe...

is sky the limit... kanineh... I mau kong Cantonis... sui boh...?